What a wonderful Christmas...

I know I left you all hanging but I was just so excited about my major Christmas gift and I will get to that later but, this was taken on Christmas Eve and it's one of my favorite pictures.

Oh this just makes me melt.

I'm also really loving my trim painting white it's looks so crisp and clean.

Doesn't she look adorable, I figured I would get some wear out of this shirt dress before it wouldn't fit anymore and I think it looks great.

This was C's "Santa" gift and even though it took several hours to put together it looks great and she loved it. In fact she has been playing with it everyday since Christmas and we have yet to move it into her room yet.

She also was a little surprised when she realized that Santa had come and ate the cookies she left out for him.

She just kept saying "Santa ate my cookies, did he like them?"

No for my fantastic Christmas gift from my loving hubby.

Oh yeah one of the best cameras ever! He kept it a secret and everything until the day before Christmas Eve when he just wanted me to open it. I'm glad I did since I got some great pictures during Christmas Eve. I'm so thankful for him, I never would have bought this for myself and never dreamed in a million years that he would get such an elaborate gift.

I love that man.

Hope you all had a terrific Christmas, I think 2011 is going to be a great with lots of new things happening.

How good was your day?

Mine was fantastic!

And for right now that is all I have to say.

Wont be posting until after Christmas so hoping all you have wonderful holiday with friends and family.

L-

Tory

What we are up to today...

To say we have a busy week ahead is a complete understatement.

However, C and I have stayed in our pajamas the entire day so far and it's looking like we will be rocking this look for the rest of the day.

No worries though we will be showering and putting on our big girl clothes bright and early tomorrow since we have some last minute shopping and groceries to pick up before the snow storm hits our little part of the world.

So on the to do list:

1. Last minute food items for several Christmas parties

2. Groceries for our home in general

3. Pick up Mr. Stanley something for his stocking

4. 1 more gift card for a gift exchange

5. Black tights for C's Christmas Eve outfit

This is just what I could think of at this point but I'm sure our list will grow by the time we leave tomorrow.

Also laundry needs to be finished, sheets need to be changed, presents needs to be wrapped and meals need to be cooked.

However for today there will be play-doh playing, coloring, cookie eating, nap taking and snuggle fests ensuing.

So let the craziness begin...tomorrow!

The newest member to our crazy world...

One of my dearest friends had her second baby the other day and she is absolutly adorable.

And the sweetest baby of the year.

Look at those arms.



Yeah for Green Tea!

Of course I mean that in extract form not liquid form...yuck!

However they seem to be doing their job and really that's all that matters.

In not ttc new, my dearest friend is going to have her baby girl soon and unlike many woman ttc babies are the kindest on my heart in this journey and I love myself a newborn!

Plus it's been over a year since we got to snuggle with a newborn, and then of course my sister's baby girl will be here in a few months as well so I will be getting lots of newborn love in to tide me over till we one day get to love on our own newborn again.

Until then we always have this sweet babe.

Nate was making her wave to all the cars driving under the skywalk.

Hope everyone is having a good start to their week.

Letters C

 Dear Cecelia-
 I was only going these pictures of our weekend and I couldn't help but be blown away by your beauty. Not just your physical beauty but by the love you show your father and I on a daily basis. You share with us your love that is never ending and full of affection. I honestly, couldn't imagine how life would be without you by our sides.
You have given us more hope and joy than anything we have ever had in our lives. There is so much going on in our lives and sometimes we have our days when we are short tempered and forgetful of your needs but you still run around with a smile on your face and love in your heart that sometimes puts me on my knees with astonishment and overcomes my heart with love.
For a little over 2 years now you have been physically apart of our lives but it's been longer  that you have been loved by us before you were even born, before you were even created. You have given us so much to be grateful for and you blew our expectations out of the water when you joined our family.

 Everyday you grow and learn something and it brings the brightest smile to my face. You father is amazed at how smart you are and how much you remind him of himself when he was younger. You have brought out some of the best parts of your father. I have watched him grow from a new husband to a provider to a father with the most protective soul.
We love you sweet babe! Even though sometime down the road our family dynamic is going to change and maybe new members will be added, you will always be our C, our first born, our answer to so many prayers.
Love-
Mama



A Thanksgiving Feast!

I think this was our best Thanksgiving yet!

It seemed to go really smoothly and that is hard to come by since we had C.

Starting with my view of Thanksgiving morning.

I was up early baking and preparing for the days events, while my loves were sound asleep.

It actually was one of my favorite parts of the day simply because they were tucked in bed, the house was quiet, yummy smells were floating through the house and it gave me that little bit of peace I needed before the busy day.

Once C and Nate woke up we were off to his Mom and Dad's for a Thanksgiving breakfast and to watch the parade. It was C's first time even noticing the parade and she especially loved the Snoopy, Dora, Spongebob floats and the musical numbers.

We spent the entire morning hanging out in our pajamas chatting and watching the television, and some of us had some pretty cute pj's on.

By the time C's nap rolled around she was out for a good 2 hours, before we had to fully wake her up to get ready to head out the door.

However, that nap gave this Mama some time to finish up her baking and enjoy some pandora and solitaire, while Mr.Stanley played video games.

I think I had a pretty sweet set up in kitchen.

A little office nook is a must in our next house.

And the cookies were a big hit!

We had a big Thanksgiving dinner at my Aunt's house and enjoyed some delicious food, as always.

C with Aunt Kassie and baby Kadence in her belly!

I can't believe next year we will have a little baby to snuggle with during the holidays!

(the spread)

(my Dad working some magic on the ham)

It was pretty darn good!

After dinner and dessert we enjoyed some Wii bowling and the boys played about a million games of pool and finished off a bottle of whiskey.

I think everyone had a fabulous time and we didn't head home until well after 10:30pm.

There is a lot that we are thankful for this year, but we are definitely looking forward to the upcoming Christmas plans and what 2011 has in store for us.

As far as Black Friday went, Emina picked me up at midnight and we headed to the mall. When we got there is was like a madhouse full of crazies. It was Emina's first time going shopping on Black Friday and she mentioned several times it would be her last. It's not my cup of tea either, I was simply there for moral support.

So we took a few trips to the hot spots and watched all the people standing outside in the 19 degree weather to save $10.00. Needless to say we went, we saw, we went home and crawled into bed.

However the next day I hopped online and finished up C's "Santa" gifts and bought some for my soon to be here niece some little presents too.

This Mama is a basket case...yuck.

Thanksgiving was a lot of fun, however I wont be posting anything about it anytime soon because as of this afternoon just a few short hours after waking up after Thanksgiving our darling daughter has come down with the flu.

I'm completely lost as to how to take care of a toddler who is throwing up and trying to tell me through throwing up that she "doesn't like it, Mommy." It's awful to hear your baby in pain and uncomfortable, in fact it's so awful I cried. Each time she threw up I cried. My husband is a champ and completely aware that his wife is a totally basket case when it comes to throwing up.

So we are cuddled up on the couch with a small bucket for the little one to throw up in and a little sippy cup of 7up and water for some sipping.

She has finally gone an hour with out throwing up, so I think we are on the downside of it.

Let's up so because Mr.Stanley is leaving all day tomorrow to go hunting and I'm sure I will not be able to hold back the tears if she got sick again.

So I will be back with a good post about how we spent our Thanksgiving, until then I will be snuggling with C until she no longer lets me (the only advantage of this situation).

Hope everyone is having a great holiday weekend with their loved ones.



Thanksgiving

Since we have a billion and one things to do in the next couple days, not to mention the late night shopping I'm taking part in on Friday, I'm jumping the gun and posting my Happy Thanksgiving message a few days early.

I hope everyone has a very thankful and blessed Thanksgiving.

Enjoy the food and hopefully you all get to see you family and friends this holiday weekend.

What's Your Thing?

I might be the only one in this boat, but does anyone else have something that they just need to have around them when they are feeling down or conflicted?

When I was pregnant with C I came across this shop in Pella that sold these charming initial charms. Well since I didn't know for sure that we were naming her Cecelia I held off on buying one.

Until the following year when we were back up there, I bought the C and the Baby footprint.

I wore it basically everyday after I bought them, up until about her 1st birthday.

Along with it I would always wear my cross necklace, my Mom got for me one Christmas from Tiffany & CO. It was beautiful and it also looked more like a T then a cross but I loved it.

Mr. Stanley would always call this necklace my "dog tag" necklace since I was sporting for my daughter's sake.

Well after her 1st birthday I found myself not "needing" to wear them much, almost like I felt pretty content with how life was going and I didn't need that reminder that I was Cece's mom or that I needed to show my faith around my neck.

Up until about March of this year.

In April we had what is categorized as a chemical pregnancy. It means that we conceived but do to some problem the baby never implanted.

Usually chemical pregnancies are so soon in a woman's cycle they haven't even taken a test to see if they are pregnant or not.

Well since we were trying I was testing days before I should.

That month I found myself wearing my "mama dog tags" again.

Ever since then I catch myself searching for them when I'm feeling low or out of sorts.

I know it sounds weird that I want some necklaces to make me feel better, but they give me a little peace.

The dream charm was added as a Christmas gift from my Mom last year.

And the bird charm was added to the cross, after our chemical pregnancy, on the flip side of it has the word brave.

I love that little charm, because it's exactly what all woman have to be to enter into this crazy and very emotional ride called motherhood. Whether you are trying to become a mom, are a mom, or have been for years and years. You must be brave to face the daily challenges of what this journey brings to you and your life.

There is no guarantee that you will have tomorrow with you children, husband, or significant other. You will carry the fear of losing your child while pregnant, but the fact is you can lose them when they're a baby, teenager, or grown adult.

I always pray that I will go before both Nathan and my children, because even though I may sport my "brave" necklace, I know I don't have that kind of bravery to make it through something that tragic.

For those people out there that have, I admire your ability to be that strong.

Even though our ttc journey with C and with trying for a second child has never been easy or what we expected it has made us stronger for the hoops we have had to hurdle.

So if grabbing a necklace gives me some peace or comfort during this whole process, then the necklace will be worn.

Hopefully one day there will be more charms with different initials dangling from the chain. But until now C is holding every one's place and keeping my heart full of joy.

What's your thing?

Some family time

(Nate, Me,MIL, C, FIL, Uncle Dusty, Uncle Trevor)

So a few weeks ago we had my husband's family and us get our pictures taken.

It was a pretty dreary day, but they still turned out great and we just got them back this weekend.

I told my husband this was one of my favorite picture.

He sweetly said "Why, what is it of?"

Oh darling it's all three of our hands.

Oh husbands.

C, I'm almost certain is aware of how darn irresistible she is.

This is one of my favorite, can you guess why?

Notice how everyone is paying attention to the photographer?

See what the mister and I are doing?

Paying attention to each other.

Aww how I love him.

Of course the following week I chopped 10in of my hair, but I'm glad I got the length documented.

Me and the Mister.

As for the rest of the weekend that we have been having, it has actually been really relaxing. Friday C, Mr.Stanley and I hung out laid around, swung by his parents. Saturday we did the same thing, except I headed out at night to spend some time with some of my favorite lady and lots of laughs were made, and many memories were brought up. Always great time.

And as of today, now C is tucked in tight asleep in her bed. Mr.Stanley is playing games on the computer and chit chatting with me. While I'm curled up on the couch catching up with emails, working on some homework.

And of course we have been acting on that simple little smiley face we received on our special little test earlier this week. Might as well cover all our bases (tmi?oh well).

Hope everyone has a good start to their week tomorrow.

Time for a big girls night out!

Me and C, Emina and Abe, Ashley (herm) and Henry, Ashley and Rhowen.

Yippie! We are having a Mama's night out tonight. Which usually consists of dinner, some drinks and if we get that far... a movie.

With all of use having a children and one with another on the way, we don't have the same night outs that we use to.

A few years ago our nights out usually ended after 1am and the next morning we were usually nursing some serious hangovers.

Now almost 3 years later, late dinner and a movie, so we can put our babe's down for bed are what the norm.

Does that make it any less enjoyable when we get the time to enjoy some good conversation and food, absolutely not.

I love the time I spend with my friends, it never really matters what we have planned.

So here's to a lovely night out, baby free, husband free full of girly talk and lots of laugh.

Hope everyone is having a great weekend.

(little) Fashion Fridays

So as promised here is a new series that totally revolves around the little one and all of her closet goodness.

Which looks a little something like this:

It was even worse when she was a newborn.

The girl has more jeans then I do (2 pairs of skinny jeans)

It's actually more ridiculous that she has so many super cute and stylish clothes but I thought why not document how great she looks.

So insert (little) Fashion Fridays.

Fridays are our days, we usually run errands, pay bills, get out of the house! We love Fridays, so in ode to our favorite day of the week, will post C's outfit choice for the day.

I'm hoping that she will look back on all this and thinks it's as great as I do.

So here is C in one of her favorite shirts this Fall her "skeleton shirt".

Shirt, knit sweater and jeans: baby gap

boots: Ugg (black)

C's new favorite accessory would be any hat.

Of course we love this black and grey hat from the gap as well.

A little close up of the shirt.

We are trying to get the use of this shirt since she shouldn't be wearing skull and cross bones into the happy holiday season.

My darling C loves to get into her closet and put on shoes, shirts and any thing she can get her hands on. She will walk out from head to toe in some get up and say " It supa cute Mommy?" Brought me to tears of laughter the first time she did this. We will go shopping in the mall and she will sift through the racks and say "Oh how cute Mama!" never gets old shopping with this little one.

So hope you enjoy her tiny fashions.

Have a great weekend.



Somedays can be a little heartbreaking

One of the sweetest things my husband has every said to me was after C was born. We were both alone in our delivery room packing to leave with our brand new daughter. As we were packing up in silence he turned to me out of no where and said "Thank you." I looked up and said "For what Babe?" He chuckled a bit as if it was so obvious why he was thanking me. He said "For how great you did, for bringing us a healthy and beautiful daughter, for giving me a great gift."

I was absolutely shocked. Not because my husband isn't ever appreciative or full of love, but he just isn't ever so well spoken. All I could do was mumble a silly "ummm well yeah your welcome hun."

My husband has the most natural grace when it comes to handling C.

She is beautiful and always has been in our eyes.

So some days when I remember that wonderful thing my husband said to me back in our hospital room, it breaks my heart because I so desperately want to give him the great gift again.

I completely understand that this is both something we give to each other, I obviously can't do it alone and wouldn't want to, but I so badly want that feeling and moment again with him.



Ok...here it goes!

It has taken me 2 weeks to decide to finally put my first post on this blog. I'm not sure if it's because then it will make our situation more real or if that means so many people will know about our situation. After a lot of discussions with my husband and a whole lot of debating within my own mind I have finally decided to finally bite the built and put this journey with hopefully a successful ending down.

So to start things off, this isn't our first go around with trying to conceive, luckily we did have a success the last time after 15 months and we were blessed with Cecelia better known as C. She was absolutely worth the wait and tough months that came with it.

Gorgeous I know!

So we have that going for us, which in a lot of people's minds should be enough. Well how could you forgo giving this sweet face a permanent best friend. Someone to go to after we pass, I just couldn't imagine her alone. Also Nathan and I know we just aren't done yet expanding our family.

Speaking of my darling husband he is my daughter's all time favorite person and why shouldn't he be? He absolutely adores her and would give her the moon if possible.

It's hard to not swoon over their love for one another, I know I do on a daily basis.

So that is a small back ground on this family. Which hopefully will be adding another member soon...later...whenever.

So enjoy, read along, and to get a better knowledge of us go the tabs and keep up.

L-

Tory